Jim Justice Next Executive Order for West Virginia (satire)

Whereas:  the state of West Virginia remains under a disaster declaration issued on March 16, 2020.

Whereas:  this disaster declaration makes the office of the Governor supremely powerful and all wise in its ability to determine the course of action to be taken by every one of the 1,792,147 citizens of this state.

Whereas: were it not for the benevolent actions taken by this office the deaths in WV would likely exceed 2 million  

Whereas:  some residents of West Virginia have begun to question rather it is right legal or ethical to wave all property rights, personal liberty and religious freedom out of existence with a stroke of the pen, and whereas some of those residents would prefer to earn a living like free men and women, despite the risk of contracting a virus, rather than face starvation and ruin while waiting on the mana sent from Charleston while the businesses that represent their lives work sit idle.

And Whereas: all rights and liberties are given and rescinded at the will and whim of government:

I Jim Justice do order and create the West Virginia Department of Muckety-Muck.

This Department is hereby charged with the regulation of all human activity in the state. This authority includes but is not limited to everything.

The secretary of Muckety-Muck shall as he/she/other sees fit  appoint as needed Under Secretaries of Muckety-Muck who shall be authorized as is the Secretary’s pleasure to regulate any and all things regarding work, worship, socialization, education, thought and opinion.

The office of Muckety –Muck’s decrees shall be final and carry the full weight of law, and may be overturned only by the order of the Supreme Governor Himself.

Any citizen, business, religious organization or other entity who fails to abide by  the regulation imposed by the Department of Muckety-Muck shall be immediately declared NON_ESSENTIAL and shall have their names stricken from all public records both electronic and paper, and shall be banished to perpetual quarantine, forever to be Social Distanced and forgotten.

I the Supreme Governor do also hereby order that the State Motto Of West Virginia be changed to reflect the “new normal” anywhere in state documents the phrase "Montani Semper Liberi"  (Mountaineers are always free) appears it shall be replaced with “facite quod dixi tibi” (Do as you are told)

I Jim Justice have spoken: so let it be written so let it be done